1.
Who is your daddy and what does he do?
- Pooby
I suppose you could consider Nils a father figure to me, but being that I am made of metal, I do not have a biological father. But if I did, I imagine he would be wonderful.
2.
Why aren't you surfing MY website www.undertoadcomics.com
right now?
- Charlie
I told Nils this question was just a shameless plug for someone else's website, an advertisement in a thinly veiled disguise, but he said I should answer it anyway.
I do not surf the internet. I do not read, I do not learn. I already know everything there is to know.
3.
Glad to see you back Wireball. It's been far too long, and I've had to rely on Ask.com to answer my burning questions in your
absence. So what exactly have you been doing all this time in your extended vacation? And were you just laid off, or was it a paid vacation?
- Your Biggest Fan
I have been placed on Nils' drawing table for some time now, processing information as I always do, not getting paid regardless of whether I am working or not. I did come up with a hilarious sitcom where the entire cast is played by sea-monkeys. Sadly, the world is not ready for such a thing.
4.
Are Andy and Rachel really getting married, or is this just an elaborate farce a la "Weekend at Bernie's" or "Weekend at Bernie's
II"? And can you believe, Andy was in my time zone when he proposed and when he called me to tell me!
- Pete
I can believe Andy was in your time zone at the time he proposed, and I am afraid it is true, your friends are engaged. Although it would be quite hilarious if your friends did come up with an elaborate farce such as this. That situation could make a great sitcom as well. I will leave those scripts up to you Pete.
5.
Why didn't john pose live for the Conan costume? Nils could have photoshopped him into the comic! It would have been waaaaaaay sexier!
- Pete
I have to agree with you on this, but Nils insists on drawing the majority of content in NibCrom Lives!. If you ask really nicely, perhaps John will grace us with a photo of his magnificent body.
6.
Yo, I'm in a wheelchair, not a coma, so what's up?
- black kid
Hello, how are you?
7.
What's up, scumbags?
- Beetlejuice
Welcome to NibCrom Central. Enjoy your stay.
8.
Are you really just a 4-inch puny wire ball that took steriods like Barry Bonds? If I take steriods will I get big like you and Barry or will my nads just shrink?
- Wannabe Buffman
While I have never taken steroids, I hear they actualy make your testicles bigger. Much bigger.
9.
When the frick are you going to put the 10 Best Albums back on the site? Who else can pay tribute to the timeless melodies of "The
Poopy Dance" by Tim and Jason or the bad@$$ rhymes of Andy and Snoop Dogg? And don't even get me started on "Lick My Naughty Spot"!!!
- Impatient Nibcrom Central Patron
Nils has not finished transferring all of the material from the old website, which includes almost all of my advice columns. I assure you he is working on your problem, so please be patient. But Nils still sucks.
10.
What do you predict to be the fashion trends of 2007 and how can I update my wardrobe without busting my budget?
- Kars
Here are the hot looks for 2007:
Giant collars are coming back in a big big way. And don't bother wearing a shirt underneath your jacket. Just get a whole slew of necklaces.
If the shirtless jacket look is too much for you, consider wearing a traditional suit with an American Flag pin.
Want to be the biggest hit of the party? Grease up your mustache and put on your old-school Padres uniform. I know you have one in the back of your closet!
I didn't forget you ladies! The disheveled look is going to be a hot look next year among all women, young and old.
Giant fur coats! The bigger the better!
And please, never leave your house without a fashionable headband.
All of these should be easy looks to pull off. If you don't have the required outfits, borrow them from a friend or go dumpster diving. You will be able to put together an awesome look for a little amount of money.